Melbourne Chat

Ugh! I suppose I'd have to do it! What a drag!



What would you do if you kept asking someone to do something and they didn't do it?

I would try reverse physchology on them <img src='http://www.melbournechat.org/public/style_emoticons/<#EMO_DIR#>/smile.gif' class='bbc_emoticon' alt='' /> always worth a try!!!



What would you do if you had lots of spaghetti but no sauce <img src='http://www.melbournechat.org/public/style_emoticons/<#EMO_DIR#>/smile.gif' class='bbc_emoticon' alt='' />

weave it into a basket and save it for later <img src='http://www.melbournechat.org/public/style_emoticons/<#EMO_DIR#>/laugh.gif' class='bbc_emoticon' alt='' />



what would you do if you had two left feet and two right shoes? <img src='http://www.melbournechat.org/public/style_emoticons/<#EMO_DIR#>/laugh.gif' class='bbc_emoticon' alt='' />

Go barefoot



What would you do if your chair went like this <img src='http://www.melbournechat.org/public/style_emoticons/<#EMO_DIR#>/officechair.gif' class='bbc_emoticon' alt='' /> all the time?

f in d i t v e r y h a r d to ty p e <img src='http://www.melbournechat.org/public/style_emoticons/<#EMO_DIR#>/laugh.gif' class='bbc_emoticon' alt=':laugh:' />



what would you do it you had a bunch of marauding ducks to the left of you and a herd of stampeding ostriches to the right? <img src='http://www.melbournechat.org/public/style_emoticons/<#EMO_DIR#>/laugh.gif' class='bbc_emoticon' alt=':laugh:' />

Try to make my neck look really long, and waddle.



What would you do if you bath tub was full of jelly beans?

put a tv on the side wall, pull up a chair and watch a movie <img src='http://www.melbournechat.org/public/style_emoticons/<#EMO_DIR#>/laugh.gif' class='bbc_emoticon' alt=':laugh:' />



what would you do if you found a fat duck stuck in your bath tub and not a jelly bean in sight? <img src='http://www.melbournechat.org/public/style_emoticons/<#EMO_DIR#>/rolleyes.gif' class='bbc_emoticon' alt=':laugh:' />

Refill the bath tub with jaffas.



What would you do if you had a time machine?

well i could go back and stock up on cheap jaffas <img src='http://www.melbournechat.org/public/style_emoticons/<#EMO_DIR#>/rolleyes.gif' class='bbc_emoticon' alt=':laugh:' />

but how would time travel affect the use by date? <img src='http://www.melbournechat.org/public/style_emoticons/<#EMO_DIR#>/ohmy.gif' class='bbc_emoticon' alt=':o' />





and what would you do if you were really hungry <img src='http://www.melbournechat.org/public/style_emoticons/<#EMO_DIR#>/sad.gif' class='bbc_emoticon' alt='' />

had a nice frozen meal <img src='http://www.melbournechat.org/public/style_emoticons/<#EMO_DIR#>/wub.gif' class='bbc_emoticon' alt=':wub:' />

but couldn't heat it up because you weren't home alone and didn't want to share? <img src='http://www.melbournechat.org/public/style_emoticons/<#EMO_DIR#>/ph34r.gif' class='bbc_emoticon' alt=':ph34r:' />

I would travel through time. Probably my first destination would be back to the 1930s and I would buy up a few cheap properties in toorak. Then I would travel into the future 50 years (say the year 2060) and sell them for a hefty profit. Then I would travel back to the current time and buy a house and quit my day job and just go fishing and chat on melbourne chat in between fishing trips! <img src='http://www.melbournechat.org/public/style_emoticons/<#EMO_DIR#>/smile.gif' class='bbc_emoticon' alt=':laugh:' />



What would you do if you saw a person at the supermarket buying about 30 bottles of Dolmio pasta sauce (because it was half price) when you knew that, from past experience, the human tolerance for that particular spaghetti sauce was going to be exceeded after the first 10 bottles <img src='http://www.melbournechat.org/public/style_emoticons/<#EMO_DIR#>/smile.gif' class='bbc_emoticon' alt=':ph34r:' />

at half price i'd think maybe they knew what they were doing and were going to add some sliced zuccini and the juice of one lemon and a few chilli flakes to make it a little more palatable <img src='http://www.melbournechat.org/public/style_emoticons/<#EMO_DIR#>/rolleyes.gif' class='bbc_emoticon' alt=':laugh:' />



and what would you do if you an irishman, an englishman and an emu in a pub? <img src='http://www.melbournechat.org/public/style_emoticons/<#EMO_DIR#>/rolleyes.gif' class='bbc_emoticon' alt=':ph34r:' />

I would ask them the punchline



What would you do if i asked you the punchline?

I would tell you the punchline of course! And the punch line would be short but also very funny.



Something like,

...the emu ordered an irish stew and an english dark ale.

...the irishman ordered an emu lager and an english meat pie

...the englishman ordered an emu lager and an irish stew <img src='http://www.melbournechat.org/public/style_emoticons/<#EMO_DIR#>/smile.gif' class='bbc_emoticon' alt=':ph34r:' />



...and then the bar man says, if you have a gripe with each other i think you should talk it out cause eating each other won't solve anything!!! <img src='http://www.melbournechat.org/public/style_emoticons/<#EMO_DIR#>/smile.gif' class='bbc_emoticon' alt=':wub:' /> ba ba!!!!!!! funny hey!!! <img src='http://www.melbournechat.org/public/style_emoticons/<#EMO_DIR#>/gathering.gif' class='bbc_emoticon' alt=':laugh:' />



What would you do if you had to come up with a punch line to this joke.....Why do camels have 2 humps?

I'd say "because it's always safer to have a spare"



What would you do if I made a crap joke?

I would laugh my head off (for a short while) and then stop and think,,...emmm I laugh at crap jokes there must be something wrong with me!!!



What would you do if you had a friend that was addicted to web surfing?

oops <img src='http://www.melbournechat.org/public/style_emoticons/<#EMO_DIR#>/laugh.gif' class='bbc_emoticon' alt=':ph34r:' />



not get between them and the computer <img src='http://www.melbournechat.org/public/style_emoticons/<#EMO_DIR#>/ph34r.gif' class='bbc_emoticon' alt='' />



what would you do if you got in the way of a friend that was addicted to web surfing and her computer? <img src='http://www.melbournechat.org/public/style_emoticons/<#EMO_DIR#>/ohmy.gif' class='bbc_emoticon' alt=':laugh:' />

she would probably whack me with a wooden spoon!!!



what would you do if there was only a few days left before daylight savings ends!!!

Shout COWABUNGA! and share the ride



What would you do if your keyboard was all mixed up?

i probably wouldn't even notice <img src='http://www.melbournechat.org/public/style_emoticons/<#EMO_DIR#>/rolleyes.gif' class='bbc_emoticon' alt='' />



what would you do if you had tickets to the moon for you and thre friends? <img src='http://www.melbournechat.org/public/style_emoticons/<#EMO_DIR#>/rolleyes.gif' class='bbc_emoticon' alt=':laugh:' />

I'd take a giant leap for man kind



What would you do if the government asked you to be a part of a fake moonwalk and con everyone into thinking you were on the moon when you really weren't?